Tuesday, May 24, 2016


Spice of your Tuesday? How about a new cover for this little YA/Paranormal/Horror story!

And if you haven't read it yet, why not? It's only 99 cents to download -- and you can catch an excerpt below. 


“Can you tell what they’re talking about?” Todd had finished off his M&Ms and trail mix and was starting on a bag of Twizzlers. How he kept so skinny and ate so much was a mystery.

“Maybe they’re getting cold feet. Sully looked a little freaked, right?”

Todd shrugged. “I hadn’t noticed. Then again, I have noticed you’ve barely taken your eyes off of her."


“You can deny it all you want, Captain Denial, but you’ve been making googly eyes at her all night."

Catch scoffed. “Googly eyes? She’s fifteen, Todd. I’m seventeen—”

“Is two years so much?”

Catch couldn’t believe this conversation was happening. “Toddy, do me a favor and butt out of my love life."

“What love life?” Catch smacked him on the back of the head. “Come on, what serious girlfriend have you had, like, ever?"

“For your information, Sandy Bayless drew a picture of me once.”

“Sandy Bayless drew a picture of you? Why?”

Catch’s frustration was building. He rubbed his face and grumbled.

“Why’d she draw a picture of you, Jonah?”

“Maybe she dug me.” 

Though saying it out loud suddenly seemed absurd. Sandy Bayless was homecoming queen. And she had been tied to the hip with the quarterback of the football team since freshman year.

“It’s not easy being a Thornwacker, is it? Even if you’re a wrestling star.”

Catch recalled the times he was teased in school for his parents’...hobby. The yelling, the name calling. The word FREAK had followed him until he joined the wrestling team in junior high--and won. Every. Single. Match. 

That’s where he and Todd differed. Todd embraced being an outcast. He embraced all the weirdness that went along with being Mary and Sebastian Thornwacker's offspring. Catch preferred being the normal guy...who happened to chase the paranormal at night. 



Wednesday, May 18, 2016

A Humbuggery Hiatus

Well, it's been a busy year, to say the least. And while E.M. Bryant is pounding away the pages, Lana's world has been much, much quieter. And that quiet has given me pause to reflect on the sometimes unnerving twinges of failure. It's a good time to remember why I write...and why some rules must never be broken...

Rule 1 of writing: Remember to do laundry. Failure to not do this will result in awkward nighttime writing in anything from the too snug tee from high school to the cocktail dress with cat hair on it. #shameful #ButIWillMoveOn

Rule 2 of writing: Water is NOT the key to life. Coffee is. And when the writing must stop for the day, gin is also a good nightcap. #BloodOfCoffee

Rule 3 of writing: Ignore your critics, but listen to your editor.

Rule 4 of writing: Embrace the bad reviews...they are what make you more legitimate than only 4 and 5 star reviews. Embrace the fact that not everyone will enjoy the book...and that is okay.

Rule 5 of writing: Believe in every ridiculous, over-the-top, minuscule, and dramatic aspect of your characters. Believe in them and they WILL APPEAR GUTLESS AND REAL ON THE PAGE.

Rule 6 of writing: Accept the praise you're given. You'll need it for future dark days.

Rule 7 of writing: Don't forget to check in with your friends and family.

Rule 8 of writing: Don't switch genres because it confuses readers. (Double oops)

Rule 9 of writing: Don't stop loving the crazy people you are creating. After all, Severus Snape was once just a black cloaked figure in J.K. Rowling's head.

Rule 10 of writing: Keep writing. <---that one, I'm kind of failing. Also, the days of the week underwear need to be retired. But fear not--this writing hiatus won't last too much longer. And in the meantime, I'm sure I'll have all kinds of embarrassing stories to fill the void...

PS: if you're looking for summer reading, someone conveniently dropped all 4 current books in this blog. Weird...